Dan at the bar.

Dan
- HEY!! An...Nana....Anana...ANNA!!!!
Anna
- Dan? Are you drunk?
Dan
- I may have taken a cwouple of bweers....Anyways, have I ever told you that you have fuckin' nice melons?!?
Anna
- Dan, you're fucked up. Go home and sleep.
Dan
- Piss off! It's party time. BURP!!! Take off your shirt and let me see those tits!
Anna
- No way, you're an ass. And you've seen 'em before!
Dan
- I love you Anna. Suck my cock beautiful!
Anna
- Fuck you...do you still have contact at the Bell Centre?
Dan
- Huh...fuck yeah!
Anna
- You get me 2 ticket for Britney Spears ands I'll suck you dry.
Dan
- Will you spit on my back seat?
Anna
- No.
Dan
- Consider it done. Let's go.

Dan at work

Albert
- Dan, I need to see you right away please.
Dan
- Be right there boss!
Albert
- Dan, did you jam the bowl in the men's bathroom?
Dan
- No Albert, why? Did someone drop a huge fucking load?
Albert
- That's part of the problem.
Dan
- What else?
Albert
- That person also thruw his underwear in the bowl for heaven's sake.
Dan
- Fuck, that's fucked up! I swear boss, I don't have anything to do with that. What kind of undies are they?
Albert
- Dan, it's a leopard thong with a huge skidmark on the wrong side and a little label on the side that reads "Dry Clean Only Dan" signed Mom.
Dan
- Fuck! Shit! Bitch! I fucked up boss. I had sex with Julia from the sales department and didn't call her back afterwards. Fuck! I left my underfuckinwear at her place. She's probably trying to get back at me.
Albert
- Good fuck?
Dan
- Not really
Albert
- Ok, Ill take care of the bathroom. You did good, Dan
Dan
- Thanks boss.